Here are just some of today's Coutts-related offerings at www.ebay.co.uk:

Fastasfcuk1981 (I had to type that carefully) is offering a Coutts bank statement holder, which he modestly says is "RARE!!!!!."  He goes on to say, "Very sought after - only available to Coutts clients. NEVER SEEN ONE ON EBAY BEFORE! Used but in decent condition - it has a couple of scrapes on the front. It is burgundy in colour and leather-like material. (Not sure if it's real leather but looks and feels genuine). Great use to hold your bank statements and VERY POSH. Get it while you can! Sorry, PayPal only."

Coutts Cheque Book Cover - RARE!!!!

His minimum opening bid is £29.99, and so far, no bidders.  For this "leather-like" RARE!!!! item in "used but in decent condition."

Westhamrobbieh123, a new eBay member, is listing a 2005 Coutts burgundy leather diary which he says is a "Very exclusive Private Banks leather diary. Extremely sought after."  While his photograph isn't exactly the most flattering in the world (more glare than diary), he has three bids to date, and the exclusive diary is now at £3.20 with seven  hours to go.

Coutts Leather Diary